Sunday, June 2, 2013

Money pit?

When we bought this house 6 years ago, we were surprised when the owners told us the lock on the back door "never worked right."

We accepted it. Fixed it about a year later (after finding said door standing WIDE open after a long day at work/school).

We found monsters sized cracks in the laundry room, our bedroom, and bathroom approximately a year after we moved in. Not a big deal, all houses settle. 

Should probably have wondered about the electricity when Ironman was out of town & I got "locked in" the garage. The van was in the garage, with about 8" clearance between the top of the van & the garage ceiling. Every time I pressed the button to open the garage door, the electricity shorted, blew a breaker, and we lost power to open the door. The emergency release was above the van. I couldn't get around the front or back of the van at all, so couldn't pull the release, so was essentially home bound until either the fault fixed itself (likely? Right...) or Ironman returned from his weeklong trip. 

Fond out it was due to a short in an EXTENSION CORD run outside to power some lights in the deck. Rated indoor only. Short was caused by melting snow. 

Two years ago we started pulling down the deck due to overly high pergola height. It was so high we never were able to get any sun protection. And the center post? Supporting the entire weight of the structure? Unanchored. Resting on the floor of the deck. Not even toenailed. And we had a porch swing hanging from this. Should we mention the two "outdoor rated" electrical ceiling fans we pulled down? Rusted through the housings. Hanging in open air (no roof over them). Yep, some high quality engineering went into the hanging of these.  

So today, Ironman decided to pull down the rails on the deck. Big old sledge, some frustration, and voila! The rails are down. 

Unfortunately...when he removed one of the rails, the top of a support post came off, revealing it had previously been repaired. He checked a little further and found that almost all of the posts are wet. Or at least damp. That's ok, it's been a pretty wet spring, and its on the north side of the house. Right? Or maybe, if you dig a little around the post, he finds the post is BURIED in the ground, not anchored in cement, and others are likely the same. 


Updates to follow. 

On the upside? We got the raised bed garden done in about two hours on Saturday!

Wednesday, May 1, 2013

I'll take annoying for $1,000, Alex

Husbands take note.

At 7:30 pm, when your wife has been awake since 5:30am, at work since 7:30am, and left work at 6pm, it is generally not a good idea to call your wife and say, "what's for dinner?"

Additionally, it is also a bad idea to allow her to FINISH checking out at the grocery store while she tells you her dinner idea.

Another bad idea is to say, "what are to doing?" when you hear her slam the trunk of the car.

The fourth bad idea would be to say, "we'll, I'd really rather have blah blah blah" when she's clearly just finished grocery shopping.

If you have definite dinner plans in mind - SPIT THEM OUT!

Clearly, you've hit the daily double when it comes to the "how to be annoying" category.

Tuesday, February 12, 2013


"It was really weird to see how our gym teacher coordinated her tshirt with her sweatpants with her shoes with her tramp stamp."

40 Days

40 days without social media.

40 days without games.

I don't know how this is going to go for me. I'm guessing it will be 40 days of opportunity.

Chances to pray for those I normally "play against". Chances to be more closely in tune with my family. Opportunities to play catch up on housework, homework, exercise, writing?

Who knows? These 40 days could be...exactly what He intended.

Tuesday, September 11, 2012

Raney the Role Model

​Since fourth grade I have run cross country and track, and I have cried plenty of times after a race. I really don’t know what was so exceptional about this meet….maybe it was the fact that I would never get to run a track meet in front of Raney again.

I didn’t know it at the time, but Raney was going to be moving back to Philadelphia the summer after my 7th grade year. She reached out to me in a way I can’t describe. Raney has empowered me and helped me to become who I am today.

​It was the city track meet, and I had just run my 1600m (1 mile) race. I was sobbing, I had a cramp the size of Timbuktu and I had tried as hard as I could…but it wasn’t enough. I hadn’t made finals and that thought alone made me want to punch a wall; I was so mad. I was walking off the brownish red, IUPUI track, and tears were streaming down my face. As I stumbled up the ramp to my teams’ tent, I saw my coach waiting for me. Raney walked towards me, and presented me with the biggest hug I could have asked for. I needed that hug like nothing else; I was so angry and disappointed in myself that all I wanted was a little praise. It was that little gesture that has changed me and I haven’t been the same ever since.

​What compelled Raney to hug me, I am not sure. I was hot, sweaty, and covered with tears. Yet she did. That simple hug from Raney brought me closer to her. Before that moment, she had just been another mom of a cross country runner, a coach to a certain extent. Then the next thing I knew, she was a role model to me. She had taken on the demeanor of someone that I could look up to and trust. Even though she now lives over 300 miles away, I know that I can still depend on Raney. The few times I have seen her since she left, she has been just as supportive and uplifting as when she was my coach. She is even considering being my Confirmation sponsor.

I have a hard time imagining why that hug changed me so drastically, but it did. Suddenly I wasn’t afraid to take a risk, or push myself to the limit. I think it may be because I finally realized that if I was ever overwhelmed or struggling, that someone would be there to help me through it. I believe that without that recognition, I wouldn’t have had the courage to do some of the things that I have done. I had the courage to shave my head, ask to be moved up a level in swim, and I even got a job. I learned that a little hug can go a long way, it can empower a person.

I hope someday that I will be able to inspire someone with such a simple action like my coach, Raney, inspired me. I have never doubted her strength or support. She will always be there for me and for that I will always be grateful. Without Raney I don’t think I would be running still, and that is something I simply cannot imagine.

My journey is not over yet, but hopefully with the knowledge that I have gained from role models like Raney; I will be able to make a success of my life. With high hopes I look ahead, with aspirations that do not have a limit. And to think…all of this is from a hug.

Tuesday, July 31, 2012


I've been working in my current department for nearly 2 years. I've been doing my current job for more than a year. I've been officially titled an "administrative assistant" for nearly 5 years, still at the same desk, doing none of the same work as when I was hired.

So today my manager came to me and told me I've been promoted. To the job I'm currently doing. To the position I currently hold.

Effective Monday, I'll be paid for doing the job I've been doing for over a year. I've worked my fingers & eyes out, compiled data, worked spreadsheets like there's an end of the world depending on it, sorted data, created forms, run queries, done things in databases I never knew was possible.

I've been praying for this. Praying that God would help the people in charge realize my value. Praying we'd be better able to make ends meet. Praying A LOT.

So now it's official. I'm so relieved all I want to do is sleep. And I've no one to tell.

It's just...sad.


Monday, March 19, 2012

Dear husband

Dear husband,

I adore you. I love you. You make our life in this house possible.

But your tv watching habits have got to go. Now.

Turn down the tv, or I will come downstairs and shove the remote into an inaccessible place you will greatly regret.


Your-tired-wife-who-has-to get-up-for-work-in 5-hours-and-who-does-NOT-want-to-hear-the-tv-blaring-below-her-bed-anymore-tonight

Tuesday, January 31, 2012

My Very Weird Life

My life. It is probably weirder than a lot of peoples' combined. Then again, I'm a lot weirder than a lot of people combined. Come to think about it, my life reflects me. Its hectic and crazy and mind-boggling! Take this for example:
The other day I had very little homework and was bored out of my mind so I started cleaning. Cleaning! Of all of the other things I could have done I started cleaning!
That just proves to you how exceptionally insane I am!
So there you have it, another brilliant entry from the mind of Kelly H, yet as I am writing this I am becoming more and more increasingly aware that I am writing this on a day when I have no homework, so that tells you another thing. I write when I am bored. Great. Just great. I did start writing so that I could talk about how crazy my life has been, but it just turned out to be another classic rant.
I'm like one of those starving artists, but instead I'm an off-topic writer. That's nice way to put it. I am an off-topic writer.

Okay so now that I have forced you to read my rant, I am going to bid you goodbye.

Saturday, January 14, 2012


While in the car the other day, I overheard the chix talking. It was oddly enlightening.

"it's not like you're my twin."

"yeah, I know"

"it's like you're my best friend. Who makes me really mad. And just won't go away."

I'm not sure if I should be concerned, but it did make me laugh.

Thursday, December 1, 2011

I am pregnant...hear me whimper

Oh good Lord, NO! I am NOT pregnant.

But I was at the time.

I was home on maternity leave - bed rest - restricted activity - whatever you want to call it. This was thirteen years ago and my chicklets were still a twinkle in my eye and a large lump in my abdomen.

I needed to get out of the house. The doctor had advised I go to the Y and swim. After trying it just once, I was hooked. These little boogers put so much strain on my bod, the effect of being pseudo-weightless even while completely and mortifyingly LARGE in the torso? Hea. Ven. Ly. Heavenly. Absolutely pure, inexplicable heaven.

Who cared that I got to know all of the lifeguards by name (due to the number of contractions I'd have while halfway through the deep end of the pool). Who cared that I'd swim the slooooooowest laps in the world (because of course, this was only allowed during lap swim, and I wasn't allowed to float, I had to SWIM)! Who cared that I'd stay in the water until the last possible second and then HEAVE myself out of the water to blunder to the bathroom to relieve my increasingly stressed bladder. Not me.

The Y saved my sanity.

Except...this one time...

I grabbed my gear. Grabbed my purse. Grabbed my swimsuit. Grabbed my towel. Grabbed everything!

Except the keys.

8.5 months pregnant with twins. And I'm locked out of my house.

Of course, this is pre-commonly-accessible-mobile-phone days, so I didn't have a phone. Or a key. I couldn't leave the house, because I didn't have a car key. But I couldn't get in the house, either.

So I scanned the house. I knew the gates were locked. The little crappers in the neighborhood opened the gates and let our dogs loose if we left the the gates unlocked. But I checked anyway. And I was right. They were locked. Safe and snug were my doggies - behind the gates - inside the house - locked up tight. Yep, I was thorough. Thoroughly stuck. Even if I wanted to, I couldn't get over the ding-dang fence.

So...went to the guest room window (we lived in a ranch-style-house at the time). Locked.

Went to the chix soon-to-be-bedroom window. Locked.

Went to the living room window. Locked.

Like I could heave myself up into an open window? Even if the window was open, the lower ledge was boob-height. This monstrous belly sticking out in front of me? Leaving me with less than one-inch of lap? How freaking ridiculous was I?!?

Apparently not ridiculous enough.

After being outside - in a coat because it's April after all - in Indiana - where snow is still a possibility in May - for roughly TWO HOURS and seeing no neighbors I know (or want to know?) I decided to hoof it down to a house where I see activity. Oh yeah, I got to tell my sob story to someone I don't even know.
This was NOT the lovely water I had imagined, remembered, longed for. Definitely not.

Turns out, after explaining my freakingly fantastic story to the person who answered the door, they don't live there. They're "watching" the house for their friend while their friend's windows are being installed. And then I got to explain the whole goofball story AGAIN to this random neighbor, whom I've never met, over the phone. And they graciously (grudgingly?) gave me permission to use their phone.

So I called my two neighbors who lived on either side of me. Only one had a key to my house. But neither was home (which I already knew). And of course, since I didn't carry a planner (hello, maternity leave? bed rest? 1998? thanks, glad you're still with me!), I didn't know how else to contact them.

I called my husband on HIS mobile phone. But he was working "in the field" so didn't know or even hear that I called.

Poop. Back to waiting on my front steps for Ironman to hopefully show up...sometime before dark?

Wait wait wait. Bored bored bored.

Except, about 30 minutes later, one of the workers from the pseudo-neighbor's house came down. I felt a little weird. Here's me and my monstro-pregnant belly, hanging out on my front steps because I have nowhere else to go, and here's this strange guy walking down the street.


He said he'd heard my whole situation and wanted to see if he could help me.

::gulp:: Oh screw it.

Cue Hallelujah Chorus!

errrrrr, well, maybe.

I explained the window thing - yep, I was paranoid enough to have locked ALL of my windows in my house. And the gates. And yes, the front door. But...there was a chance I'd forgotten to lock the back door. The one that leads out into the padlocked back yard. Where I couldn't get my pregnant belly. Because I couldn't climb the fence. Because I was uber-pregnant. With twins.

So random pseudo-stranger offered to check.

And then he hopped the fence. Easy as pie. (and yes, I could do it now - because I'm no longer monstro-the-whale)

Pseudo Stranger: "Um, ma'am?"

Me: "Yes?"

PS: "Um, your windows are locked back here. Do you want me to check your door?"

Me: "Yes, PLEASE!" (because at this point, though I had used the bathroom at pseudo-neighbor's house, I was desperate, people! I reallllllly needed to use it AGAIN)

PS: "Um, ma'am?"

Me: wriggling nervously, trying not to wet my pants "Yes?"

PS: walks around the corner of the house to the gate and says, "Um, ma'am, the back door is unlocked. What do you want me to do?"

Me: "oh my gosh, just walk in. Just walk in. When you walk in, you'll be in the laundry room. Turn left and the front door will be straight ahead of you!"

PS: "Are you sure?"

Me: attempting to hold onto my dignity "Yes, whatever you need to do, just please, thank you, please go straight through."

And he did.

And THAT is how I didn't escape to the Y. Because after all of that, the chicklets and I needed a bathroom. And a nap.

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